Building 191 rooms

ICE ORCHID:     PLANT
MARROW GRYPHON: MONSTER
SPECTRAL TOAD: VERMIN
WERE-PIXIE: HUMANOID
HOOK OGRE: BOSS
MAN-HOG: CRITTER


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----y--U C--B h-- m \--b--k--
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--f s w--X--[--e--r--v
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Room A.
Observatory. Star charts, half-ground lenses, celestial globes, tables of astronomical data (looks like random numbers) and pulsar emissions. HOOK OGRE mesmerized by whatever it sees through single enormous telescope. If you broke the telescope's lens you could climb out of the dungeon through it.
Room B.
Waterfall that trickles in through crack in wall, disappears in swirling vortex into crack in earth. Tricky climb, must be made to pass room. MAN-HOG den hidden in cave behind waterfall, half-digested UNGUENT OF THE DEAD in stomach of sleeping MAN-HOG.
Room C.
Panicky WERE-PIXIE wearing obviously-stolen DIAMOND GLOVES caught at fork in road, not sure which way to go. In one round IMPLET the STINKING PEDDLER, conspicuously missing DIAMOND GLOVES, will emerge on scene and demand it back.
Room D.
BAUDUS the PARANOID CHILD, pacing. Could swear there was a secret door somewhere along this otherwise featureless corridor (there isn't).
Room E.
Salt lick. Vein of salt (somehow) in wall of cave, MAN-HOGs lapping at it. If you bring salt to other parts of cave the MAN-HOGs there will lick it out of your hands and it will be adorable.
Room F.
SIGHT: Everything is coated in fine layer of snail slime.
SOUND: Whistling of underworld wind from cracks in wall.
Seems like straight corridor. Really obvious secret doors spaced out at five-metre intervals along corridor - loose bricks, bookshelves w/ books sticking out, candlesticks on funny angles, etc. All just spray acid except one.
Room G.
Single enormous ICE ORCHID growing up towards skylight in very top of room. SPECTRAL TOAD nesting in roots.
Room H.
MAN-HOGs engaged in elaborate mating ritual. Single WERE-PIXIE watching w/ creepy intensity.
Room I.
SMELL: Strangely cold, like being in a meat freezer.
SOUND: Every noise echoes precisely once.
Dungeon cenote. Sides overgrown with ICE ORCHID, climbdownable. Beautiful turquoise blue water. Bioluminescent bacteria intelligent, psychic, capable of projecting terrifyingly potent hallucinations/activating devotional centre of brain to make you think you see God. Bottom of cenote littered w/ human skeletons from sacrifices. Bacteria feed off flesh. One exit through underwater tunnel, skeleton in tunnel clutches bag of diamond dust and wears water-damaged SHIELD OF THE HEAVENS. WERE-PIXIE cultists soon to return.
Room J.
One passage being slowly walled off by WERE-PIXIEs under supervision of cranky, half-asleep HOOK OGRE who is enforcing compliance w/ threat of physical violence, eternal torment.
Room K.
HYLDISSON the HUMBLE HUNTER, playing the flute. Has no idea they're in a dungeon. Can see everything around them perfectly clearly, just refuses to believe it's a dungeon. Will confabulate other things it could be. Flute not magical unless you desperately need it to be.
Room L.
MARROW GRYPHON asleep in centre of irregular room, can only be squeezed round w/ difficulty.
Room M.
Couple of sorry-looking WERE-PIXIEs roasting SPECTRAL TOAD over fire. In surprisingly good mood, will share. If you get sick and pass out from the feast they will definitely kill you, but otherwise harmless.
Room N.
SMELL: Spoiled-sweet, like garbage.
SOUND: Boom of distant explosions, clatter of drills.
Rope bridge across underground lake. Third exit at water level, can be accessed by diving into water, but you'll want some plan for getting out again. MARROW GRYPHON that lives in lake usually not hungry.
Room O.
SIGHT: Walls are murky green glass. You almost feel like you can see through to the next room.
HEFROGG the POLITE PALADIN consulting beautifully-drawn, inaccurate dungeon map. They are looking for a LENS OF LIGHT, an heirloom of their family, which was stolen by WERE-PIXIEs and is now hidden in a filth-crusted sack somewhere in room _.
Room P.
Room shaped like inside of tetrahedron. Anyone standing in etched circle in room's centre teleported to random other room of dungeon. Can be controlled by fetching tetrahedronal crystal in room o, will grant access to secret treasure chamber w/ no doors leading to it. Someone has to stay behind to teleport you out again.
Room Q.
Couple of WERE-PIXIEs around shallow pit, gambling on combat between trained SPECTRAL TOAD. Intruders will be hurled into pit, but if you wait long enough the furious loser will accuse the winner of cheating and a fight will ensure.
Room R.
BRODRIGHT the STARVING ASTRONOMER, armed w/ SABRE OF FOG, on quest to kill a MARROW GRYPHON, which they are only semi-certain even lives in this dungeon.
Room S.
One exit blocked by enormous obese SPECTRAL TOAD, will only move if presented with still-alive captured WERE-PIXIE or enormous quantity of garbage.
Room T.
Staircase wraps around inner wall of well. One exit high up, one at water level. Water pitch black. MARROW GRYPHON that lives in well usually not hungry, can be roused to surface by ringing bell at very top of shaft.
Room U.
Mechanical platform that takes you from top of shaft to bottom of shaft w/ ease. Third exit halfway up shaft, goes by too quickly to jump to. Each time you use it, 25% chance that tinkering WERE-PIXIEs will jam the platform just below the third exit and attack from above.
Room V.
SMELL: Stagnant air and decay.
Two statues. One always tells lies, one always tells the truth. They only know things that statues would know. None of the passages out of this room are trapped or dangerous in any way.
Room W.
Spiral staircase. Young WERE-PIXIEs sliding down bannisters. Will run away if they spot you, bring back angry parents.
Room X.
Foucault pendulum tracing path in sand of dungeon floor. Messing with it affects gravity slightly throughout entire dungeon.
Room Y.
HOOK OGRE lowering itself to play dice w/ WERE-PIXIE retainers. Will pretend it's condescending to let you live so long as you amuse it by joining in. Actually, not totally sure it can take you, not really in fighting mood, will throw game and say you've earned your freedom. Has DICE OF GOOD, might be convinced to wager it if stakes high enough.
Room Z.
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
Ledge halfway up wall of big cylindrical pit-cavern, no way in, out except via entrances to ledge. MARROW GRYPHON trapped at bottom of pit, bleeding from a number of minor wounds. Extremely long spiked sticks for poking it with. Couple of WERE-PIXIEs indulging in this pastime.
Room [.
Big wooden door halfway along corridor locked as fuck. Key in possession of WERE-PIXIE in room .
Room \.
One path overgrown w/ ICE ORCHID, one dry and barren, one littered w/ skeletons. ICE ORCHIDs carnivorous, practiced in throwing bones across room for no other reason that they can't digest them and find them unseemly.
Room ].
Clay nest of SPECTRAL TOAD in corner. Single WERE-PIXIE tasked w/ exterminating it, no idea where to begin, will lead you to hiding place of QUIVER OF DESTRUCTION in room d if you can give it a hand. Surprisingly reliable and honest.
Room ^.
SOUND: Sound like crunching glass or gnawing teeth. Comes from within walls.
Bubbling lake of mildly corrosive alkaline goo must be navigated via stepping stones. SPECTRAL TOAD hidden in goo, obviously. Harmless until you get any blood in the goo, then will go into feeding frenzy.
Room _.
SIGHT: Walls rough-hewn chunks of black glass, edges sharp to touch.
SOUND: Whistling of underworld wind from cracks in wall.
Trash midden. Not planned, just naturally developed here. Infested by tiny well-concealed SPECTRAL TOAD. No treasure, just bits of clothing that might have been magical once but no longer are.
Room `.
WERE-PIXIE barracks-room, mostly empty. One fat WERE-PIXIE slobberingly asleep in corner. Has MASK OF SHADOW on string around neck.
Room a.
HOOK OGRE is having tea party w/ nervous WERE-PIXIEs, kidnapped IMPETYNGUS the HUMBLE BARBARIAN. Will insist that you join it. Will murder people for impoliteness, reward proper etiquette w/ fine and expensive cakes.
Room b.
SIGHT: Dust on every flat surface.
Thick grove of ICE ORCHID makes it impossible to see the other side of the room. MARROW GRYPHON lurks in ambush within. It has just fed and is currently in process of burying the bones of a MAN-HOG in the heavy loam of the room's floor, feeding the plants with marrow to maintain their symbiotic relationship. Still happy to kill PCs though, can always save them for later.
Room c.
Lava tube. Cracks in walls, WERE-PIXIEs compressed in spaces behind cracks. Not planning to ambush, terrified of you, want you to go away. One has a IVORY CIGAR and no idea how to use it. Neither do you.
Room d.
SOUND: Burble of distant river.
Hall lined w/ oil paintings of forgotten aristocracy. Some have been defaced. Cursory knowledge of local history will tell you which conceals secret door.
Room e.
SIGHT: Walls are murky green glass. You almost feel like you can see through to the next room.
SYGGYNGUS the FORGETFUL EXPLORER corners you, demands that you answer their riddles to determine which of the paths before you is true and which is false. One path conceals a swinging-blade trap, SYGGYNGUS the FORGETFUL EXPLORER fully aware of where this is and how to circumvent it.
Room f.
Floor of cave is shoulder-high thicket of ICE ORCHIDS. Exits raised. Stones protruding from top of thicket let you jump across. ICE ORCHIDs carnivorous, MAN-HOGs in symbiotic relationship w/ them will attack when you are halfway across.
Room g.
WERE-PIXIE marketplace. Stalls selling rusted-through pots, moldy fruit, actual piles of shit. Violence prohibited in marketplace, they will not hurt you as long as you stay within the prescribed boundaries and don't break any of their weird taboos.
Room h.
SIGHT: Walls carved w/ ancient glyphs, adorned w/ partial mosaics.
EDLOSIA the OPPORTUNISTIC TORTURER, wearing HAT OF GOOD, meditating atop stone pillar to unlock its full power, which they intend to use to conquer world.
Room i.
SOUND: Dead silence. Even your voices muffled.
MARDWIND the TRAITOROUS TINSMITH attempting to domesticate MAN-HOG, with limited success. Has been reliably informed that MAN-HOG's favourite food is ICE ORCHID, will pay semi-handsomely for samples.
Room j.
Beautiful woman made of glass, living in pit of liquid glass. Can see future with 95% accuracy. No particular reason to help PCs, but would rather like to get her hands on fragile glass chalice in room V (she'll eat it). Would be worth a lot if somehow extracted from dungeon and sold as artwork. Scream is like damp fingertip on rim of wineglass, summons MARROW GRYPHON from another part of dungeon.
Room k.
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
Cube-shaped room w/ square sliding puzzle on plinth in centre. Fetching missing piece from room and solving puzzle will completely reconfigure dungeon, reality around PCs. Roll a new dungeon, place PCs in random room.
Room l.
SIGHT: The roots of an ancient tree emerge from the roof.
Hall of statues that look exactly like MARROW GRYPHON. One of them is hollow and filled with SPECTRAL TOAD.
Room m.
Shrine to dungeon god. Altar will curse you if you touch it unless you prepare the proper sacrifices, which consist of one ritually smothered MAN-HOG. If you do it will bless you. One WERE-PIXIE elsewhere in dungeon is priest, knows secret to this.
Room n.
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
SOUND: Creepy singing, like every nursery rhyme in every horror movie ever.
Feast hall / audience chamber of underworld king. One entrance on either side of hall. HOOK OGRE in throne at end of hall hearing stream of WERE-PIXIE petitioners.
Room o.
Big wooden door halfway along corridor locked as fuck. Key in possession of WERE-PIXIE in room ^.
Room p.
SIGHT: Extremely high ceiling narrows to tiny skylight.
THAGISK the NERVOUS PAINTER, with broken leg, desperately trying to fend off a couple of SPECTRAL TOAD. Is carrying HAND OF THE MORNING, which would be easier to take from their corpse.
Room q.
SOUND: Agonizingly slow waterdrip.
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
Extremely steep slope. Rope required to go up, down. Your choice whether the PCs start at bottom or top. Outcropping of ICE ORCHID halfway up seems like it would provide handhold, does, but also tries to eat PCs.
Room r.
SMELL: Zoosmell, like pressing your face to a tiger and inhaling.
One passage being slowly walled off by WERE-PIXIEs under supervision of cranky, half-asleep HOOK OGRE who is enforcing compliance w/ threat of physical violence, eternal torment.
Room s.
SOUND: Rumble of tectonic plates shifting, impossibly loud and distant.
Smooth, round tunnel of enormous SPECTRAL TOAD, which you will find advancing towards you when you are halfway along.
Room t.
Bunch of WERE-PIXIEs quivering in fear as you approach. MARROW GRYPHON followed you in, is directly behind you.
Room u.
Two statues. One always tells lies, one always tells the truth. They only know things that statues would know. None of the passages out of this room are trapped or dangerous in any way.
Room v.
SIGHT: Fetishes of bone and feathers dangle from the ceiling.
Pool of stagnant water with treasure chest at bottom. Treasure chest contains bound, gagged PHOEBAMPER the HELPFUL MATHEMATICIAN, is temporarily watertight. If released PHOEBAMPER the HELPFUL MATHEMATICIAN will demand vengeance on WERE-PIXIE in room , offer reward for assistance in this matter.
Room w.
Foucault pendulum tracing path in sand of dungeon floor. Messing with it affects gravity slightly throughout entire dungeon.
Room x.
SOUND: Sound like crunching glass or gnawing teeth. Comes from within walls.
Almost-frictionless surface. Works like the ice puzzles in Pokemon - once you pick a direction you're stuck with it until you hit a solid surface. Dotted with menhirs. One WERE-PIXIE w/ projectile weapon at far end of room.
Room y.
Stepping stones over slow-trickling underground river. Actually pretty easy to cross. MAN-HOGs drinking at edges, not aggressive unless provoked. Easy to provoke though.
Room z.
Looks like three-doored room. Tarnished mirror in corner will, if cleaned, show secret fourth exit in reflection. If taken to any other room it will also show a secret extra exit in that room. Secret extra exit always goes to same place, no matter where you are in the world. Overuse has chance of awakening evil reflection monsters.
Room {.
Single enormous carnivorous ICE ORCHID that is secretly intelligent and the mastermind behind everything that happens in this dungeon.
Room |.
Crossroads, but one exit just loops back around into the other one. Walls of loop contain shelves for entombed corpses w/ gold coins on their eyes and SPECTRAL TOAD concealed in their flesh.
Room }.
Enormous crystal-clear underground lake w/ ICE ORCHID growing around it, couple of MAN-HOGs peacefully drinking at edges. BLUDGEON OF BLOOD lies clearly visible at very bottom of lake, which is much deeper than it looks.
Room ~.
Beam of light comes down from above. FLAIL OF CHAOS embedded in monolith in room's centre. Can only be removed by hand of true king, which can be found - dried, placed in wall sconce, candle placed in curled fingers, is now magical torch that reveals ghosts - in room W.
Room .
Dungeon cenote. Sides overgrown with ICE ORCHID, climbdownable. Beautiful turquoise blue water. Bioluminescent bacteria intelligent, psychic, capable of projecting terrifyingly potent hallucinations/activating devotional centre of brain to make you think you see God. Bottom of cenote littered w/ human skeletons from sacrifices. Bacteria feed off flesh. One exit through underwater tunnel, skeleton in tunnel clutches bag of diamond dust and wears water-damaged HAT OF THE CAT. WERE-PIXIE cultists soon to return.
Room .
SIGHT: Empty, rusted iron cages hang from hooks in the wall.
Dungeon oasis. Lake of pure water, grove of ICE ORCHID, MAN-HOGs and WERE-PIXIEs drinking together in peace. If you start a fight here everyone in the dungeon will find out about it and regard you with unremitting hostility forever.
Room .
SMELL: Metallic tang of hour-old blood.
YASHAXAS the SHOUTY WIZARD impressing WERE-PIXIEs w/ magical powers of BREASTPLATE OF THE SANDS, attempting to convince them that it is their rightful king. Will turn them on PCs if they do not show YASHAXAS the SHOUTY WIZARD proper signs of obeisance. WERE-PIXIEs just humouring YASHAXAS the SHOUTY WIZARD, will happily play along.
Room .
Completely empty room. Or is it? Yes. Yes it is.
Room .
SMELL: Meaty reek of underworld flowers, like frying fat and potpourri.
MARROW GRYPHON asleep in centre of irregular room, can only be squeezed round w/ difficulty.
Room .
SMELL: Air disgustingly humid.
Old wooden chest, given wide berth by nervous, prowling WERE-PIXIEs who are 100% certain it's a mimic. 20% chance this is true. Key to chest, even if it's a mimic, is clutched in the hand of the top half of a skeleton in room . Chest contains reasonable amount of gold, partially-chewed DOUBLET OF THE ELEMENTS (operates at half efficiency until repaired), gnawed bottom half of skeleton. Possible if chest not mimic that it will follow PCs around dungeon fucking w/ them.
Room .
Panicky WERE-PIXIE wearing obviously-stolen POET'S SANDALS caught at fork in road, not sure which way to go. In one round MOTHOSSUS the PEDANTIC GRAVEDIGGER, conspicuously missing POET'S SANDALS, will emerge on scene and demand it back.
Room .
SMELL: Strangely warm, like being in a kiln.
Treasure room. Magnetic gates prevent you removing any gold or steel, even if you brought it in with you. HAMMER OF SUMMONING made of pure gold in hand of enormous porcelain golem. Talisman in room deactivates gates, activates golem.
Room .
Rallying grounds for small WERE-PIXIE army. HOOK OGRE currently giving rousing speech to assembled phalanx, promising riches/success in afterlife to soldier that brings back the the juiciest human baby.
Room .
SMELL: Acrid tang of goblin shit.
SOUND: Whistling of underworld wind from cracks in wall.
WERE-PIXIEs in flimsy tin-pan armour, wielding long pointy sticks, riding poorly-tamed MAN-HOGs, practicing jousting.
Room .
Featureless span of corridor w/ pacing HOOK OGRE in bleak, contemplative mood, searching for reason even to live. Not aggressive until given one - then will immediately turn on PCs. Will come up w/ one on own in half hour or so.
Room .
WERE-PIXIE games room. Mildewed cardboard boxes, rotting tomes with amusing titles like Ye Olde Playeres Handbooke. Spotty WERE-PIXIES hunched over reasonably flat rock playing Humans and Hamlets with dice made of bone and precious stones. One of the dice is actually lucky.
Room .
Corridor lined on each side with mirrors so it looks like infinite PCs crawling through infinite dungeons. There is a mirror somewhere in room and next time you enter it you will see your reflections banging against the glass, claiming that they are the real PCs and you are just their reflections.
Room .
SOUND: Chirps of cave crickets.
WERE-PIXIE on a banjo, playing the Humanoid Blues.
Room .
Site of ancient battle. Hundreds of skeletons, rusted armour, shattered helms. Single, functioning GIANT'S PIKE somewhere in mess, but searching for it likely to disturb spirits of the dead.
Room .
SOUND: Creepy singing, like every nursery rhyme in every horror movie ever.
HOOK OGRE dabbling in painting, composing a still life from scene of SPECTRAL TOAD and bones. Having trouble getting the SPECTRAL TOAD to stay still. Has left a paint canister (turbulent green) in room , politely promises to kill you unless you go get it right now.
Room .
HEFWEG the OBESE CLOWN looking for girl/boy/personfriend, who they think is being held captive by WERE-PIXIES. Actually came with them willingly to get away from HEFWEG the OBESE CLOWN, now rethinking it, dungeon life losing sense of mystery and grandeur. Still hates HEFWEG the OBESE CLOWN though. Is in room S.
Room .
SIGHT: Fetishes of bone and feathers dangle from the ceiling.
Iron portcullis, WERE-PIXIE on other side asking substantial fee to raise it. Will slam it shut when you're directly under it to try and spike you to death. If you approach this from the other side the WERE-PIXIE will also be on the other side, it can squeeze through the bars.
Room .
Corridor from abandoned prison. Walls lined w/ jail cells, most of the bars rotted away or overgrown w/ ICE ORCHID. MAN-HOGs nesting in cell halfway along, loose brick behind cell wall conceals NOSE OF THE SWAMP that only works a third of the time, is haunted by ghost of SILKROOK the INCOMPETENT KNIGHT who will tell you how to fix it if you get vengeance on their jailer.
Room .
Enormous brass lever that raises/lowers water level throughout whole dungeon. There is another, similar level in room .
Room .
Long flight of marble stairs painted black and white like piano keys. Stepping on wrong stairs flattens them into slide, makes climbing extremely difficult, getting down fun. Somebody in room knows secret pattern or it's hidden in mosaic on walls. Anyone who's a musician gets a bonus to working it out. You decide which side PCs start on.
Room .
SMELL: Acrid tang of goblin shit.
MARROW GRYPHON w/ DAGGER OF THE DRAGON stuck in it. Extremely unhappy. Someone in room concealing serious wound, would like DAGGER OF THE DRAGON back.
Room .
Bemused MARROW GRYPHON being worshipped by bunch of prostrated WERE-PIXIEs. 25% chance this is actually a clever trick to get close enough to kill it.
Room .
SOUND: Whistling of underworld wind from cracks in wall.
Huge cavernous room w/ tiny campfire somewhere in middle. WERE-PIXIEs sitting around campfire, roasting sausages, telling filthy stories.
Room .
Seems like straight corridor. Really obvious secret doors spaced out at five-metre intervals along corridor - loose bricks, bookshelves w/ books sticking out, candlesticks on funny angles, etc. All just spray acid except one.
Room .
Circular room. When you enter all the doors slam shut, it spins around faster and faster until you don't know which way you're facing, save or be nauseated then roll 1d4 for direction you leave in. Square hole in centre, square wooden peg hidden in room can lock it in place.
Room .
Two bridges across enormous bottomless pit. They do not intersect. Easy to go directly across, difficult to turn corners.
Room .
SOUND: Toads croaking.
When you look down this hallway it seems to get narrower and narrower until you reach the end, which is child-sized. When you walk down it it stays the same size but you shrink. Works very differently if there's another way around.
Room .
SOUND: Almost-subsonic warble of cave songbirds.
SMELL: Faint breeze. Hard to tell where from, seems to change directions.
High ledge w/ two entrances that looks out over vast lake of lava. One WERE-PIXIE peacefully fishing w/ brass rod, wire, hook. If left alone long enough he will catch something. 50% chance of hungry lava fish, 50% chance of lava treasure.
Room .
Time moves slower the closer you get to the middle of this room. FENDLOSIA the CREEPY SCHOLAR, wearing a crown, wielding SAINT'S SPEAR caught in stasis at exact centre. In fact crown is cursed - you can remove it pretty easily, breaking the curse and halting the effect, but in the time it takes you several years will have passed outside. FENDLOSIA the CREEPY SCHOLAR is notorious character from history.
Room .
SMELL: Faint breeze. Hard to tell where from, seems to change directions.
SIGHT: Empty, rusted iron cages hang from hooks in the wall.
WERE-PIXIE herdsmen squabbling over where the sweetest ICE ORCHIDS are. Ones in room apparently not sweet enough. Herds of MAN-HOGs getting bored, hungry.
Room .
SOUND: Every noise echoes to an absurd degree.
SIGHT: Immense limestone stalactites hang from ceiling.
BRODASIUS the EMACIATED SALESMAN consulting beautifully-drawn, inaccurate dungeon map. They are looking for a BOTTLE OF PLAGUE, an heirloom of their family, which was stolen by WERE-PIXIEs and is now hidden in a filth-crusted sack somewhere in room _.
Room .
SOUND: Almost-subsonic warble of cave songbirds.
SIGHT: Room is part of ancient castle, walls are slabs of stone.
At least twenty doors. Most just lead into cupboards full of toxic mould, foul garderobes or empty sarcophagi. A few are unopenable, having nothing but rock behind them. THAGOSSUS the CHEERFUL SHEPHERD has got themselves trapped behind one and there's a half-rotted SHIELD OF THE BEAR in the wardrobe behind another.
Room .
SMELL: Metallic tang of hour-old blood.
HOOK OGRE is having tea party w/ nervous WERE-PIXIEs, kidnapped ZERKLER the FORGETFUL DRUID. Will insist that you join it. Will murder people for impoliteness, reward proper etiquette w/ fine and expensive cakes.
Room .
MAKRINGO the VENGEFUL POLITICIAN, suffering catastrophic memory failure, no longer sure which way they came in. Single glowing blue mushroom in centre of room does nothing if touched. Memories leeched by prolonged exposure to its light. Eating it gives you all the memories it's absorbed.
Room .
Apparently empty room w/ very high ceiling. Vibrations in floor disturb the nests, cause rain of SPECTRAL TOADs. Safe to move around edges of room.
Room .
SOUND: Whistling of underworld wind from cracks in wall.
One exit blocked by enormous obese SPECTRAL TOAD, will only move if presented with still-alive captured WERE-PIXIE or enormous quantity of garbage.
Room .
Inverted ziggurat - steps going down to bottom of room, altar to dungeon god at lowest point. SCABLANTA the LYING PLAYWRIGHT is tied to altar with WERE-PIXIEs preparing to sacrifice them. Everything exactly as it seems.
Room .
Enormous pile of BOTTLE OF THE SEAs, all exactly alike, dumped haphazardly in corner. Only one is real. The rest are clever fakes that have a 25% chance of working once and then break. Somewhere in room is concealed the secret of finding the real one. Possibly in someone's brain.
Room .
SMELL: Faint breeze. Hard to tell where from, seems to change directions.
Crevasse just wide enough to jump across. Darkness above. Anyone who falls in comes out of roof, keeps falling until caught. There was a huge butterfly net in room and now you know why.
Room .
Floor of cave is shoulder-high thicket of ICE ORCHIDS. Exits raised. Stones protruding from top of thicket let you jump across. ICE ORCHIDs carnivorous, MAN-HOGs in symbiotic relationship w/ them will attack when you are halfway across.
Room .
SIGHT: Ammonite, trilobite fossils visible in walls.
SMELL: Humans being cooked. Indistinguishable from roast pork except to trained noses.
Beautiful woman made of glass, living in pit of liquid glass. Can see future with 95% accuracy. No particular reason to help PCs, but would rather like to get her hands on fragile glass chalice in room (she'll eat it). Would be worth a lot if somehow extracted from dungeon and sold as artwork. Scream is like damp fingertip on rim of wineglass, summons MARROW GRYPHON from another part of dungeon.
Room .
Terraced volcanic pools of bubbling, sulphurated water, getting warmer as you get closer to the bottom. MARROW GRYPHON drinking from second-lowest pool, temporarily pacified by calming effects of hot spring, will not attack unless provoked.
Room .
Narrow bridge across swiftly-rushing underground river. Anyone who falls in will be carried out of dungeon, take bashing damage from rocks. WERE-PIXIE ambush party clinging to underside of bridge and/or ceiling, will attack halfway across. Some kind of perception check to spot.
Room .
HOOK OGRE's walk-in wardrobe. One entrance through wardrobe doors, one hidden behind layers of clothing. Careful searching will reveal a DIADEM OF THE ZEPHYR, two living scarves that try to strangle you and a WERE-PIXIE in fancy dress.
Room .
Mechanical platform that takes you from top of shaft to bottom of shaft w/ ease. Third exit halfway up shaft, goes by too quickly to jump to. Each time you use it, 25% chance that tinkering WERE-PIXIEs will jam the platform just below the third exit and attack from above.
Room .
Actual dungeon, exists to hold prisoners. Guarded by pair of WERE-PIXIEs, one sleepy, one watchful. They are siblings. Couple of human captives in pitiful condition, starving in cells. One is CHANDELOPA the WEEPING ASTRONOMER.
Room .
SIGHT: There is a mirror in this room. It's not magical or special, it's an ordinary mirror.
OBEROBO the AMBITIOUS SOLDIER corners you, demands that you answer their riddles to determine which of the paths before you is true and which is false. One path conceals a swinging-blade trap, OBEROBO the AMBITIOUS SOLDIER fully aware of where this is and how to circumvent it.
Room .
PHALOPPON the WHIMSICAL SAILOR, wearing PIRATE'S CODPIECE, meditating atop stone pillar to unlock its full power, which they intend to use to conquer world.
Room .
Room shaped like inside of tetrahedron. Anyone standing in etched circle in room's centre teleported to random other room of dungeon. Can be controlled by fetching tetrahedronal crystal in room , will grant access to secret treasure chamber w/ no doors leading to it. Someone has to stay behind to teleport you out again.
Room .
SOUND: Rumble of tectonic plates shifting, impossibly loud and distant.
SIGHT: Ammonite, trilobite fossils visible in walls.
Apparent dead end in WERE-PIXIE workshop. Secret door concealed beneath anvil. WERE-PIXIE blacksmith not pleased to see you, will attack with half-forged BOOMERANG OF TRUTH, only continue to forge it if compelled. Possibility that PCs emerge from beneath anvil.
Room .
One path overgrown w/ ICE ORCHID, one dry and barren, one littered w/ skeletons. ICE ORCHIDs carnivorous, practiced in throwing bones across room for no other reason that they can't digest them and find them unseemly.
Room .
SMELL: Delicious stew boiling. The more you sniff at it the more it changes to rotting flesh.
Hall lined w/ oil paintings of forgotten aristocracy. Some have been defaced. Cursory knowledge of local history will tell you which conceals secret door.
Room .
SMELL: Strangely cold, like being in a meat freezer.
SIGHT: Walls made of petrified wood, as if you're in the bole of a huge ancient tree.
THEODAS the RACIST SALESMAN and LUBBAS the BLIND COURTIER fighting for possession of a UNGUENT OF THE JUNGLE, each with an extremely good argument for why it is rightfully theirs. Actually they stole it from the hoard of a HOOK OGRE, who had it as a birthday present from their underworld pen pal and to whom it is of great sentimental value.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls made of petrified wood, as if you're in the bole of a huge ancient tree.
HOOK OGRE chained by leg or eye-stalk to centre of room. Half a dozen scabby WERE-PIXIEs taunting and jeering it.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls made of petrified wood, as if you're in the bole of a huge ancient tree.
Vertical shaft w/ rope hanging from ceiling, goes two-thirds of way to floor.
Room .
Big circular room, HOOK OGRE armed with GLAIVE OF ICE patrolling boundaries. HOOK OGRE will not allow anyone to pass straight through crossroads. Doesn't mind you turning corners. Cheating by trying to turn two corners will be strictly punished.
Room .
WERE-PIXIE herdsmen squabbling over where the sweetest ICE ORCHIDS are. Ones in room apparently not sweet enough. Herds of MAN-HOGs getting bored, hungry.
Room .
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
Pit with SPECTRAL TOAD lurking at bottom. V. poorly concealed. A couple of gold coins and a COLD-IRON CUIRASS in extremely poor condition gleam among the bones of a dead adventurer.
Room .
Rope bridge across underground lake. Third exit at water level, can be accessed by diving into water, but you'll want some plan for getting out again. MARROW GRYPHON that lives in lake usually not hungry.
Room .
Beautiful woman made of glass, living in pit of liquid glass. Can see future with 95% accuracy. No particular reason to help PCs, but would rather like to get her hands on fragile glass chalice in room k (she'll eat it). Would be worth a lot if somehow extracted from dungeon and sold as artwork. Scream is like damp fingertip on rim of wineglass, summons MARROW GRYPHON from another part of dungeon.
Room .
Mechanical platform that takes you from top of shaft to bottom of shaft w/ ease. Third exit halfway up shaft, goes by too quickly to jump to. Each time you use it, 25% chance that tinkering WERE-PIXIEs will jam the platform just below the third exit and attack from above.
Room .
LUBBLET the CHEERFUL SALESMAN consulting beautifully-drawn, inaccurate dungeon map. They are looking for a LAMP OF THE DAMNED, an heirloom of their family, which was stolen by WERE-PIXIEs and is now hidden in a filth-crusted sack somewhere in room .
Room .
SMELL: Air painfully dry.
Dungeon cenote. Sides overgrown with ICE ORCHID, climbdownable. Beautiful turquoise blue water. Bioluminescent bacteria intelligent, psychic, capable of projecting terrifyingly potent hallucinations/activating devotional centre of brain to make you think you see God. Bottom of cenote littered w/ human skeletons from sacrifices. Bacteria feed off flesh. One exit through underwater tunnel, skeleton in tunnel clutches bag of diamond dust and wears water-damaged HEADBAND OF THE SEA. WERE-PIXIE cultists soon to return.
Room .
Hall lined w/ oil paintings of forgotten aristocracy. Some have been defaced. Cursory knowledge of local history will tell you which conceals secret door.
Room .
SOUND: Every noise echoes precisely once.
Foucault pendulum tracing path in sand of dungeon floor. Messing with it affects gravity slightly throughout entire dungeon.
Room .
SOUND: Coins clinking.
Big wooden door halfway along corridor locked as fuck. Key in possession of WERE-PIXIE in room x.
Room .
Lava tube. Cracks in walls, WERE-PIXIEs compressed in spaces behind cracks. Not planning to ambush, terrified of you, want you to go away. One has a SAILOR'S MASK and no idea how to use it. Neither do you.
Room .
SOUND: Howling laughter, swiftly fades to nothing.
SMELL: Humans being cooked. Indistinguishable from roast pork except to trained noses.
Floor of cave is shoulder-high thicket of ICE ORCHIDS. Exits raised. Stones protruding from top of thicket let you jump across. ICE ORCHIDs carnivorous, MAN-HOGs in symbiotic relationship w/ them will attack when you are halfway across.
Room .
SIGHT: Bioluminescent bacteria gleam in the walls and the dark mud of the floor.
SOUND: Muffled voices from next room.
Panicky WERE-PIXIE wearing obviously-stolen HELM OF DISGUISE caught at fork in road, not sure which way to go. In one round HOGGOXIS the ENERGETIC SOLDIER, conspicuously missing HELM OF DISGUISE, will emerge on scene and demand it back.
Room .
Two statues. One always tells lies, one always tells the truth. They only know things that statues would know. None of the passages out of this room are trapped or dangerous in any way.
Room .
DAENOLMO the BOASTFUL WITCH, pacing. Could swear there was a secret door somewhere along this otherwise featureless corridor (there isn't).
Room .
SOUND: Agonizingly slow waterdrip.
SIGHT: Extremely high ceiling narrows to tiny skylight.
Seems like straight corridor. Really obvious secret doors spaced out at five-metre intervals along corridor - loose bricks, bookshelves w/ books sticking out, candlesticks on funny angles, etc. All just spray acid except one.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls are murky green glass. You almost feel like you can see through to the next room.
SOUND: Muffled voices from next room.
WERE-PIXIEs engaging in orgiastic rite to win favour of dungeon god. Incredibly eager for you to join in.
Room .
MARROW GRYPHON w/ HOWLING STILETTO stuck in it. Extremely unhappy. Someone in room G concealing serious wound, would like HOWLING STILETTO back.
Room .
SMELL: Faint breeze. Hard to tell where from, seems to change directions.
SOUND: Gloop of bubbling mud.
Looks like three-way intersection. One exit actually trap, leads to immediate dead end and floor collapse. Then WERE-PIXIEs come in and start poking you w/ sticks.
Room .
SMELL: Strangely cold, like being in a meat freezer.
SOUND: Burble of distant river.
HOOK OGRE chained by leg or eye-stalk to centre of room. Half a dozen scabby WERE-PIXIEs taunting and jeering it.
Room .
One passage being slowly walled off by WERE-PIXIEs under supervision of cranky, half-asleep HOOK OGRE who is enforcing compliance w/ threat of physical violence, eternal torment.
Room .
SOUND: Creepy singing, like every nursery rhyme in every horror movie ever.
Corridor lined on each side with mirrors so it looks like infinite PCs crawling through infinite dungeons. There is a mirror somewhere in room and next time you enter it you will see your reflections banging against the glass, claiming that they are the real PCs and you are just their reflections.
Room .
STYFONIA the DISEASED SWINEHERD, armed w/ HUNTER'S SPEAR, on quest to kill a MARROW GRYPHON, which they are only semi-certain even lives in this dungeon.
Room .
Lightless oubliette. TYRASIUS the POLITE SWINEHERD has been trapped in here for at least twenty years, some WERE-PIXIEs coming by to feed and water them occasionally.
Room .
SILKOTH the MASKED POLITICIAN corners you, demands that you answer their riddles to determine which of the paths before you is true and which is false. One path conceals a swinging-blade trap, SILKOTH the MASKED POLITICIAN fully aware of where this is and how to circumvent it.
Room .
SMELL: Metallic tang of hour-old blood.
One path overgrown w/ ICE ORCHID, one dry and barren, one littered w/ skeletons. ICE ORCHIDs carnivorous, practiced in throwing bones across room for no other reason that they can't digest them and find them unseemly.
Room .
SOUND: Every noise echoes precisely once.
MAN-HOG den. Where they keep their babies. Parents not pleased to see you.
Room .
SHIROXIS the STARVING THIEF and ZERKLER the SINGING EXPLORER fighting for possession of a CORD OF THE STARS, each with an extremely good argument for why it is rightfully theirs. Actually they stole it from the hoard of a HOOK OGRE, who had it as a birthday present from their underworld pen pal and to whom it is of great sentimental value.
Room .
SOUND: Slow, monotonous weeping. Sounds like it's been going for a very long time.
IMPETYNGUS the CHEERFUL HUNTER, wearing DIADEM OF WINTER, meditating atop stone pillar to unlock its full power, which they intend to use to conquer world.
Room .
Space is bent in such a way that walking down this tunnel will bring you out in room .
Room .
SOUND: Muffled voices from next room.
Space-distorting statue in exactly-square corner of corridor. Shaking right hand will increase number of corners until corridor is mile-long side of polygon. Shaking left hand will decrease it again.
Room .
SIGHT: Cobwebs in every corner.
One of those Ripley's Believe It Or Not rooms where there's a row of mirrors along one wall and once you go around the corridor you can see through them. Couple of WERE-PIXIEs behind mirrors making fun of PCs, will flee as they approach. If the PCs linger, SOUKFOPP the STARVING CLOWN will come through on the other side of the mirrors and accidentally reveal something they would kill to keep secret.
Room .
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
Enormous crystal-clear underground lake w/ ICE ORCHID growing around it, couple of MAN-HOGs peacefully drinking at edges. BLUDGEON OF TIME lies clearly visible at very bottom of lake, which is much deeper than it looks.
Room .
SMELL: Salty as sea-air.
WERE-PIXIEs engaging in orgiastic rite to win favour of dungeon god. Incredibly eager for you to join in.
Room .
When you look down this hallway it seems to get narrower and narrower until you reach the end, which is child-sized. When you walk down it it stays the same size but you shrink. Works very differently if there's another way around.
Room .
HOOK OGRE bedchamber. Four-poster bed, priceless paintings kidnapped from world are hung on walls and artistically befouled. Fairy kept in cage as singing nightlight begs release, claims to be able to grant wishes, can't. Golden key to cage discarded in room h, HOOK OGRE concluded they will never need it. Cage highly portable, otherwise unbreakable.
Room .
Extremely steep slope. Rope required to go up, down. Your choice whether the PCs start at bottom or top. Outcropping of ICE ORCHID halfway up seems like it would provide handhold, does, but also tries to eat PCs.
Room .
SIGHT: There is a mirror in this room. It's not magical or special, it's an ordinary mirror.
Bubbling lake of mildly corrosive alkaline goo must be navigated via stepping stones. SPECTRAL TOAD hidden in goo, obviously. Harmless until you get any blood in the goo, then will go into feeding frenzy.
Room .
SIGHT: Ammonite, trilobite fossils visible in walls.
High ledge w/ two entrances that looks out over vast lake of lava. One WERE-PIXIE peacefully fishing w/ brass rod, wire, hook. If left alone long enough he will catch something. 50% chance of hungry lava fish, 50% chance of lava treasure.
Room .
STYFAXAS the OLD KING, with broken leg, desperately trying to fend off a couple of SPECTRAL TOAD. Is carrying CORD OF THE PIT, which would be easier to take from their corpse.
Room .
Old wooden chest, given wide berth by nervous, prowling WERE-PIXIEs who are 100% certain it's a mimic. 20% chance this is true. Key to chest, even if it's a mimic, is clutched in the hand of the top half of a skeleton in room . Chest contains reasonable amount of gold, partially-chewed BELT OF SPRING (operates at half efficiency until repaired), gnawed bottom half of skeleton. Possible if chest not mimic that it will follow PCs around dungeon fucking w/ them.
Room .
Enormous mirror is scrying-portal to alternate realms. HOOK OGRE getting stern lecture from overboss in Plane of Chaos/other, better dungeon/Hell, will shortly emerge in extremely foul mood. If there is a mirror anywhere else in the dungeon this mirror will let you look out of it.
Room .
Completely empty room. Or is it? Yes. Yes it is.
Room .
Looks like empty room. Actually maw of cave leviathan, those weird stalagmites its teeth. Glimmer of treasure deep in gullet is pyrite lure. MAN-HOGs pick dead flesh from between teeth.
Room .
SOUND: Rumble of tectonic plates shifting, impossibly loud and distant.
Smooth, round tunnel of enormous SPECTRAL TOAD, which you will find advancing towards you when you are halfway along.
Room .
SOUND: Chirps of cave crickets.
HOOK OGRE's walk-in wardrobe. One entrance through wardrobe doors, one hidden behind layers of clothing. Careful searching will reveal a METEOR SHIELD, two living scarves that try to strangle you and a WERE-PIXIE in fancy dress.
Room .
Bedchamber of three, four WERE-PIXIEs. Sodden and filthy. Careful inspection of damp rags that serve as bedding will reveal a(n) APPARATUS OF EVIL in surprisingly good condition, but forces save against filth fever.
Room .
SOUND: Toads croaking.
Hideout for rebellious WERE-PIXIEs, unwilling to recognize authority of HOOK OGRE, want to establish tiny republic in forgotten dungeon crevice.
Room .
SMELL: Delicious stew boiling. The more you sniff at it the more it changes to rotting flesh.
Ledge halfway up wall of big cylindrical pit-cavern, no way in, out except via entrances to ledge. MARROW GRYPHON trapped at bottom of pit, bleeding from a number of minor wounds. Extremely long spiked sticks for poking it with. Couple of WERE-PIXIEs indulging in this pastime.
Room .
MARROW GRYPHON den. Sulphuric fumes vent from somewhere deep within. Contains skeleton holding AXE OF WISHES, which in addition to other powers gets +2 against MARROW GRYPHON. 50% chance that MARROW GRYPHON is out. Secret way out of dungeon, big enough for monster to fit through.
Room .
Single incredibly-intelligent WERE-PIXIE has found only space in dungeon where it is possible to just sit and think. If left to own devices will rule own kingdom on surface world in ~10 years.
Room .
Looks like three-way intersection. One exit actually trap, leads to immediate dead end and floor collapse. Then WERE-PIXIEs come in and start poking you w/ sticks.
Room .
SOUND: Rumble of tectonic plates shifting, impossibly loud and distant.
Formerly a wizard's study. Now a breeding pair of MAN-HOGs has made a nest of the spellbooks, which reveal interesting magical snippets if closely examined. Torn-up pages, gummed back together, may have produced odd new spells.
Room .
Clay nest of SPECTRAL TOAD in corner. Single WERE-PIXIE tasked w/ exterminating it, no idea where to begin, will lead you to hiding place of BLESSED CLOCK in room if you can give it a hand. Surprisingly reliable and honest.
Room .
SIGHT: Room is part of ancient mansion, walls are rotting wood.
Bunch of WERE-PIXIEs who were just pointlessly fucking sitting there waiting for something to walk in so they could attack it.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls are murky green glass. You almost feel like you can see through to the next room.
HOOK OGRE laboratory. Weird hybrid things bubble away in glass tanks. At least one attempted crossbreed between WERE-PIXIE and MAN-HOG. HOOK OGRE not there. GUNGANNY the PEDANTIC PEDDLER pretends to be experimental captive, is actually willing lab assistant.
Room .
Cornered, enraged, only semi-wounded MARROW GRYPHON preparing to unleash its ultimate attack on bunch of spear-wielding WERE-PIXIEs who think they're doing much better than they are. If you wait you can get it before its ultimate attack recharges.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls rough-hewn chunks of black glass, edges sharp to touch.
SMELL: Acrid tang of goblin shit.
THAGUS the RHYMING ASSASSIN, playing the flute. Has no idea they're in a dungeon. Can see everything around them perfectly clearly, just refuses to believe it's a dungeon. Will confabulate other things it could be. Flute not magical unless you desperately need it to be.
Room .
SMELL: Old people and medicine.
One of those Ripley's Believe It Or Not rooms where there's a row of mirrors along one wall and once you go around the corridor you can see through them. Couple of WERE-PIXIEs behind mirrors making fun of PCs, will flee as they approach. If the PCs linger, AMAFLANTA the CURSED PEASANT will come through on the other side of the mirrors and accidentally reveal something they would kill to keep secret.
Room .
SMELL: Faint breeze. Hard to tell where from, seems to change directions.
WERE-PIXIE on a banjo, playing the Humanoid Blues.
Room .
SMELL: Dry and musty, like mummy wrappings and black mold.
Map room. Globes, nautical charts, atlases, blueprints, guidebooks. HOOK OGRE studying X-marked plan of faraway island, so enthralled that it has difficulty noticing PCs. Exquisite rug on room's floor seems like abstract pattern, careful study reveals it to be map of dungeon itself.
Room .
MAKOO the JOLLY DRUID attempting to domesticate MAN-HOG, with limited success. Has been reliably informed that MAN-HOG's favourite food is ICE ORCHID, will pay semi-handsomely for samples.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls are murky green glass. You almost feel like you can see through to the next room.
HOOK OGRE lowering itself to play dice w/ WERE-PIXIE retainers. Will pretend it's condescending to let you live so long as you amuse it by joining in. Actually, not totally sure it can take you, not really in fighting mood, will throw game and say you've earned your freedom. Has EYE OF EVIL, might be convinced to wager it if stakes high enough.
Room .
SOUND: Slow, monotonous weeping. Sounds like it's been going for a very long time.
SMELL: Air disgustingly humid.
Rope bridge across underground lake. Third exit at water level, can be accessed by diving into water, but you'll want some plan for getting out again. MARROW GRYPHON that lives in lake usually not hungry.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls rough-hewn chunks of black glass, edges sharp to touch.
Apparent dead end in WERE-PIXIE workshop. Secret door concealed beneath anvil. WERE-PIXIE blacksmith not pleased to see you, will attack with half-forged BRASS AXE, only continue to forge it if compelled. Possibility that PCs emerge from beneath anvil.
Room .
Couple of WERE-PIXIEs around shallow pit, gambling on combat between trained SPECTRAL TOAD. Intruders will be hurled into pit, but if you wait long enough the furious loser will accuse the winner of cheating and a fight will ensure.
Room .
MAN-HOG den. Where they keep their babies. Parents not pleased to see you.
Room .
Single incredibly-intelligent WERE-PIXIE has found only space in dungeon where it is possible to just sit and think. If left to own devices will rule own kingdom on surface world in ~10 years.
Room .
SOUND: Crunch of footsteps on sand.
Enormous brass lever that raises/lowers water level throughout whole dungeon. There is another, similar level in room .
Room .
SOUND: Rumble of tectonic plates shifting, impossibly loud and distant.
SIGHT: Extremely high ceiling narrows to tiny skylight.
Bedchamber of three, four WERE-PIXIEs. Sodden and filthy. Careful inspection of damp rags that serve as bedding will reveal a(n) DUST OF ICE in surprisingly good condition, but forces save against filth fever.
Room .
HOOK OGRE laboratory. Weird hybrid things bubble away in glass tanks. At least one attempted crossbreed between WERE-PIXIE and MAN-HOG. HOOK OGRE not there. LUBBUNTO the TRAITOROUS FOP pretends to be experimental captive, is actually willing lab assistant.
Room .
SOUND: Dead silence. Even your voices muffled.
Single enormous carnivorous ICE ORCHID that is secretly intelligent and the mastermind behind everything that happens in this dungeon.