Building 191 rooms

TOMB WEED:       PLANT
RUST DRAKE: MONSTER
ROT SCORPION: VERMIN
HOOK DEVIL: HUMANOID
ELDER VAMPIRE: BOSS
HUNCHBACK COBRA: CRITTER

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------{--` U t--[ b--Q V g--j--z--
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----------]--S--R--P W--O N M-- ----
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------ --Z \--G--C--J H--I
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------k a--f B--D--E--F --
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-- u A L--T K--_--y----
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----------n----^--X q--
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-- m--e--d--Y --
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------o--v---- -- --
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----s--w---- --
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Room A.
Cornered, enraged, only semi-wounded RUST DRAKE preparing to unleash its ultimate attack on bunch of spear-wielding HOOK DEVILs who think they're doing much better than they are. If you wait you can get it before its ultimate attack recharges.
Room B.
SOUND: Muffled voices from next room.
SMELL: Humans being cooked. Indistinguishable from roast pork except to trained noses.
RUST DRAKE asleep in centre of irregular room, can only be squeezed round w/ difficulty.
Room C.
SOUND: Hiss of steam escaping through cracks in floor.
THAGATHEON the RACIST BEGGAR, armed w/ JAVELIN OF THE WOLF, on quest to kill a RUST DRAKE, which they are only semi-certain even lives in this dungeon.
Room D.
SMELL: Strangely cold, like being in a meat freezer.
Circular room. When you enter all the doors slam shut, it spins around faster and faster until you don't know which way you're facing, save or be nauseated then roll 1d4 for direction you leave in. Square hole in centre, square wooden peg hidden in room K can lock it in place.
Room E.
SMELL: Faint breeze. Hard to tell where from, seems to change directions.
ELDER VAMPIRE is having tea party w/ nervous HOOK DEVILs, kidnapped ZENIVER the NERVOUS HUNTER. Will insist that you join it. Will murder people for impoliteness, reward proper etiquette w/ fine and expensive cakes.
Room F.
ELDER VAMPIRE's walk-in wardrobe. One entrance through wardrobe doors, one hidden behind layers of clothing. Careful searching will reveal a BEADS OF THE OWL, two living scarves that try to strangle you and a HOOK DEVIL in fancy dress.
Room G.
SOUND: Coins clinking.
Beautiful woman made of glass, living in pit of liquid glass. Can see future with 95% accuracy. No particular reason to help PCs, but would rather like to get her hands on fragile glass chalice in room (she'll eat it). Would be worth a lot if somehow extracted from dungeon and sold as artwork. Scream is like damp fingertip on rim of wineglass, summons RUST DRAKE from another part of dungeon.
Room H.
Mechanical platform that takes you from top of shaft to bottom of shaft w/ ease. Third exit halfway up shaft, goes by too quickly to jump to. Each time you use it, 25% chance that tinkering HOOK DEVILs will jam the platform just below the third exit and attack from above.
Room I.
SIGHT: Immense limestone stalactites hang from ceiling.
Trash midden. Not planned, just naturally developed here. Infested by tiny well-concealed ROT SCORPION. No treasure, just bits of clothing that might have been magical once but no longer are.
Room J.
SIGHT: Everything is coated in fine layer of snail slime.
Floor of cave is shoulder-high thicket of TOMB WEEDS. Exits raised. Stones protruding from top of thicket let you jump across. TOMB WEEDs carnivorous, HUNCHBACK COBRAs in symbiotic relationship w/ them will attack when you are halfway across.
Room K.
CHANDIAN the TRAITOROUS SALESMAN consulting beautifully-drawn, inaccurate dungeon map. They are looking for a SPIDER FLUTE, an heirloom of their family, which was stolen by HOOK DEVILs and is now hidden in a filth-crusted sack somewhere in room J.
Room L.
Foucault pendulum tracing path in sand of dungeon floor. Messing with it affects gravity slightly throughout entire dungeon.
Room M.
One passage being slowly walled off by HOOK DEVILs under supervision of cranky, half-asleep ELDER VAMPIRE who is enforcing compliance w/ threat of physical violence, eternal torment.
Room N.
SIGHT: Dust on every flat surface.
Extremely steep slope. Rope required to go up, down. Your choice whether the PCs start at bottom or top. Outcropping of TOMB WEED halfway up seems like it would provide handhold, does, but also tries to eat PCs.
Room O.
PHALLANTA the STARVING NURSE, with broken leg, desperately trying to fend off a couple of ROT SCORPION. Is carrying WOODEN HORN, which would be easier to take from their corpse.
Room P.
SOUND: Toads croaking.
NEELFOPP the CHEERFUL GARDENER, wearing CROWN OF GOOD, meditating atop stone pillar to unlock its full power, which they intend to use to conquer world.
Room Q.
SMELL: Strangely cold, like being in a meat freezer.
SIGHT: Fetishes of bone and feathers dangle from the ceiling.
Bemused RUST DRAKE being worshipped by bunch of prostrated HOOK DEVILs. 25% chance this is actually a clever trick to get close enough to kill it.
Room R.
Thick grove of TOMB WEED makes it impossible to see the other side of the room. RUST DRAKE lurks in ambush within. It has just fed and is currently in process of burying the bones of a HUNCHBACK COBRA in the heavy loam of the room's floor, feeding the plants with marrow to maintain their symbiotic relationship. Still happy to kill PCs though, can always save them for later.
Room S.
SMELL: Strangely warm, like being in a kiln.
HOOK DEVIL marketplace. Stalls selling rusted-through pots, moldy fruit, actual piles of shit. Violence prohibited in marketplace, they will not hurt you as long as you stay within the prescribed boundaries and don't break any of their weird taboos.
Room T.
Enormous pile of GIANT'S RODs, all exactly alike, dumped haphazardly in corner. Only one is real. The rest are clever fakes that have a 25% chance of working once and then break. Somewhere in room is concealed the secret of finding the real one. Possibly in someone's brain.
Room U.
SOUND: Sound like crunching glass or gnawing teeth. Comes from within walls.
SMELL: Zoosmell, like pressing your face to a tiger and inhaling.
Terraced volcanic pools of bubbling, sulphurated water, getting warmer as you get closer to the bottom. RUST DRAKE drinking from second-lowest pool, temporarily pacified by calming effects of hot spring, will not attack unless provoked.
Room V.
SOUND: Slow, monotonous weeping. Sounds like it's been going for a very long time.
Old wooden chest, given wide berth by nervous, prowling HOOK DEVILs who are 100% certain it's a mimic. 20% chance this is true. Key to chest, even if it's a mimic, is clutched in the hand of the top half of a skeleton in room . Chest contains reasonable amount of gold, partially-chewed SHIELD OF THE CRAB (operates at half efficiency until repaired), gnawed bottom half of skeleton. Possible if chest not mimic that it will follow PCs around dungeon fucking w/ them.
Room W.
One of those Ripley's Believe It Or Not rooms where there's a row of mirrors along one wall and once you go around the corridor you can see through them. Couple of HOOK DEVILs behind mirrors making fun of PCs, will flee as they approach. If the PCs linger, HYLDIVER the ABSENT-MINDED WITCH will come through on the other side of the mirrors and accidentally reveal something they would kill to keep secret.
Room X.
SOUND: Agonizingly slow waterdrip.
Two statues. One always tells lies, one always tells the truth. They only know things that statues would know. None of the passages out of this room are trapped or dangerous in any way.
Room Y.
High ledge w/ two entrances that looks out over vast lake of lava. One HOOK DEVIL peacefully fishing w/ brass rod, wire, hook. If left alone long enough he will catch something. 50% chance of hungry lava fish, 50% chance of lava treasure.
Room Z.
SOUND: Boom of distant explosions, clatter of drills.
Big wooden door halfway along corridor locked as fuck. Key in possession of HOOK DEVIL in room e.
Room [.
SMELL: Dry and musty, like mummy wrappings and black mold.
Dungeon cenote. Sides overgrown with TOMB WEED, climbdownable. Beautiful turquoise blue water. Bioluminescent bacteria intelligent, psychic, capable of projecting terrifyingly potent hallucinations/activating devotional centre of brain to make you think you see God. Bottom of cenote littered w/ human skeletons from sacrifices. Bacteria feed off flesh. One exit through underwater tunnel, skeleton in tunnel clutches bag of diamond dust and wears water-damaged SLIPPERS OF PIERCING. HOOK DEVIL cultists soon to return.
Room \.
One exit blocked by enormous obese ROT SCORPION, will only move if presented with still-alive captured HOOK DEVIL or enormous quantity of garbage.
Room ].
SMELL: Air painfully dry.
Seems like straight corridor. Really obvious secret doors spaced out at five-metre intervals along corridor - loose bricks, bookshelves w/ books sticking out, candlesticks on funny angles, etc. All just spray acid except one.
Room ^.
GARAERYS the DEAF SERGEANT corners you, demands that you answer their riddles to determine which of the paths before you is true and which is false. One path conceals a swinging-blade trap, GARAERYS the DEAF SERGEANT fully aware of where this is and how to circumvent it.
Room _.
SILKWEG the LYING KING and YASHEFFO the SHOUTY HIGHWAYMAN fighting for possession of a PROPHET'S CIGAR, each with an extremely good argument for why it is rightfully theirs. Actually they stole it from the hoard of a ELDER VAMPIRE, who had it as a birthday present from their underworld pen pal and to whom it is of great sentimental value.
Room `.
SOUND: Every noise echoes precisely once.
Ledge halfway up wall of big cylindrical pit-cavern, no way in, out except via entrances to ledge. RUST DRAKE trapped at bottom of pit, bleeding from a number of minor wounds. Extremely long spiked sticks for poking it with. Couple of HOOK DEVILs indulging in this pastime.
Room a.
Room shaped like inside of tetrahedron. Anyone standing in etched circle in room's centre teleported to random other room of dungeon. Can be controlled by fetching tetrahedronal crystal in room , will grant access to secret treasure chamber w/ no doors leading to it. Someone has to stay behind to teleport you out again.
Room b.
Spiral staircase. Young HOOK DEVILs sliding down bannisters. Will run away if they spot you, bring back angry parents.
Room c.
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
Hall lined w/ oil paintings of forgotten aristocracy. Some have been defaced. Cursory knowledge of local history will tell you which conceals secret door.
Room d.
Iron portcullis, HOOK DEVIL on other side asking substantial fee to raise it. Will slam it shut when you're directly under it to try and spike you to death. If you approach this from the other side the HOOK DEVIL will also be on the other side, it can squeeze through the bars.
Room e.
Looks like three-doored room. Tarnished mirror in corner will, if cleaned, show secret fourth exit in reflection. If taken to any other room it will also show a secret extra exit in that room. Secret extra exit always goes to same place, no matter where you are in the world. Overuse has chance of awakening evil reflection monsters.
Room f.
ORDMAEL the ARROGANT POET looking for girl/boy/personfriend, who they think is being held captive by HOOK DEVILS. Actually came with them willingly to get away from ORDMAEL the ARROGANT POET, now rethinking it, dungeon life losing sense of mystery and grandeur. Still hates ORDMAEL the ARROGANT POET though. Is in room .
Room g.
Rope bridge across underground lake. Third exit at water level, can be accessed by diving into water, but you'll want some plan for getting out again. RUST DRAKE that lives in lake usually not hungry.
Room h.
Panicky HOOK DEVIL wearing obviously-stolen WIG OF THE SUN caught at fork in road, not sure which way to go. In one round TETHLEY the KIND KNIGHT, conspicuously missing WIG OF THE SUN, will emerge on scene and demand it back.
Room i.
One path overgrown w/ TOMB WEED, one dry and barren, one littered w/ skeletons. TOMB WEEDs carnivorous, practiced in throwing bones across room for no other reason that they can't digest them and find them unseemly.
Room j.
SIGHT: Floor covered w/ layer of gritty sand.
SOUND: Every noise echoes precisely once.
When you look down this hallway it seems to get narrower and narrower until you reach the end, which is child-sized. When you walk down it it stays the same size but you shrink. Works very differently if there's another way around.
Room k.
Clay nest of ROT SCORPION in corner. Single HOOK DEVIL tasked w/ exterminating it, no idea where to begin, will lead you to hiding place of UNGUENT OF THE DEAD in room ~ if you can give it a hand. Surprisingly reliable and honest.
Room l.
Salt lick. Vein of salt (somehow) in wall of cave, HUNCHBACK COBRAs lapping at it. If you bring salt to other parts of cave the HUNCHBACK COBRAs there will lick it out of your hands and it will be adorable.
Room m.
Hall lined w/ oil paintings of forgotten aristocracy. Some have been defaced. Cursory knowledge of local history will tell you which conceals secret door.
Room n.
SIGHT: Walls carved w/ ancient glyphs, adorned w/ partial mosaics.
SOUND: Chirps of cave crickets.
Enormous crystal-clear underground lake w/ TOMB WEED growing around it, couple of HUNCHBACK COBRAs peacefully drinking at edges. WAND OF THE DEAD lies clearly visible at very bottom of lake, which is much deeper than it looks.
Room o.
SOUND: Slow, monotonous weeping. Sounds like it's been going for a very long time.
Huge cavernous room w/ tiny campfire somewhere in middle. HOOK DEVILs sitting around campfire, roasting sausages, telling filthy stories.
Room p.
ELDER VAMPIRE is having tea party w/ nervous HOOK DEVILs, kidnapped FELAXAS the VENGEFUL CLOWN. Will insist that you join it. Will murder people for impoliteness, reward proper etiquette w/ fine and expensive cakes.
Room q.
SIGHT: Empty, rusted iron cages hang from hooks in the wall.
SOUND: Crunch of footsteps on sand.
One passage being slowly walled off by HOOK DEVILs under supervision of cranky, half-asleep ELDER VAMPIRE who is enforcing compliance w/ threat of physical violence, eternal torment.
Room r.
SOUND: Almost-subsonic warble of cave songbirds.
SMELL: Zoosmell, like pressing your face to a tiger and inhaling.
Enormous brass lever that raises/lowers water level throughout whole dungeon. There is another, similar level in room .
Room s.
Couple of sorry-looking HOOK DEVILs roasting ROT SCORPION over fire. In surprisingly good mood, will share. If you get sick and pass out from the feast they will definitely kill you, but otherwise harmless.
Room t.
Panicky HOOK DEVIL wearing obviously-stolen COWL OF FOG caught at fork in road, not sure which way to go. In one round FENDLET the OPPORTUNISTIC PEDDLER, conspicuously missing COWL OF FOG, will emerge on scene and demand it back.
Room u.
Treasure room. Magnetic gates prevent you removing any gold or steel, even if you brought it in with you. AXE OF THE MOUNTAIN made of pure gold in hand of enormous porcelain golem. Talisman in room deactivates gates, activates golem.
Room v.
Room shaped like inside of tetrahedron. Anyone standing in etched circle in room's centre teleported to random other room of dungeon. Can be controlled by fetching tetrahedronal crystal in room r, will grant access to secret treasure chamber w/ no doors leading to it. Someone has to stay behind to teleport you out again.
Room w.
SIGHT: Immense limestone stalactites hang from ceiling.
WOFIVER the HUMBLE KNIGHT consulting beautifully-drawn, inaccurate dungeon map. They are looking for a WINGED TOME, an heirloom of their family, which was stolen by HOOK DEVILs and is now hidden in a filth-crusted sack somewhere in room .
Room x.
Floor of cave is shoulder-high thicket of TOMB WEEDS. Exits raised. Stones protruding from top of thicket let you jump across. TOMB WEEDs carnivorous, HUNCHBACK COBRAs in symbiotic relationship w/ them will attack when you are halfway across.
Room y.
Corridor from abandoned prison. Walls lined w/ jail cells, most of the bars rotted away or overgrown w/ TOMB WEED. HUNCHBACK COBRAs nesting in cell halfway along, loose brick behind cell wall conceals DWARVEN DRUM that only works a third of the time, is haunted by ghost of QUEEKUNTO the TRAITOROUS SHEPHERD who will tell you how to fix it if you get vengeance on their jailer.
Room z.
SIGHT: Walls made of petrified wood, as if you're in the bole of a huge ancient tree.
Two statues. One always tells lies, one always tells the truth. They only know things that statues would know. None of the passages out of this room are trapped or dangerous in any way.
Room {.
Mechanical platform that takes you from top of shaft to bottom of shaft w/ ease. Third exit halfway up shaft, goes by too quickly to jump to. Each time you use it, 25% chance that tinkering HOOK DEVILs will jam the platform just below the third exit and attack from above.
Room |.
SOUND: Coins clinking.
Dungeon cenote. Sides overgrown with TOMB WEED, climbdownable. Beautiful turquoise blue water. Bioluminescent bacteria intelligent, psychic, capable of projecting terrifyingly potent hallucinations/activating devotional centre of brain to make you think you see God. Bottom of cenote littered w/ human skeletons from sacrifices. Bacteria feed off flesh. One exit through underwater tunnel, skeleton in tunnel clutches bag of diamond dust and wears water-damaged VEIL OF PLAGUE. HOOK DEVIL cultists soon to return.
Room }.
One path overgrown w/ TOMB WEED, one dry and barren, one littered w/ skeletons. TOMB WEEDs carnivorous, practiced in throwing bones across room for no other reason that they can't digest them and find them unseemly.
Room ~.
SOUND: Slow, monotonous weeping. Sounds like it's been going for a very long time.
Big wooden door halfway along corridor locked as fuck. Key in possession of HOOK DEVIL in room j.
Room .
RUST DRAKE asleep in centre of irregular room, can only be squeezed round w/ difficulty.
Room .
Almost-frictionless surface. Works like the ice puzzles in Pokemon - once you pick a direction you're stuck with it until you hit a solid surface. Dotted with menhirs. One HOOK DEVIL w/ projectile weapon at far end of room.
Room .
Beautiful woman made of glass, living in pit of liquid glass. Can see future with 95% accuracy. No particular reason to help PCs, but would rather like to get her hands on fragile glass chalice in room (she'll eat it). Would be worth a lot if somehow extracted from dungeon and sold as artwork. Scream is like damp fingertip on rim of wineglass, summons RUST DRAKE from another part of dungeon.
Room .
SMELL: Air disgustingly humid.
SIGHT: There is a mirror in this room. It's not magical or special, it's an ordinary mirror.
Rope bridge across underground lake. Third exit at water level, can be accessed by diving into water, but you'll want some plan for getting out again. RUST DRAKE that lives in lake usually not hungry.
Room .
Seems like straight corridor. Really obvious secret doors spaced out at five-metre intervals along corridor - loose bricks, bookshelves w/ books sticking out, candlesticks on funny angles, etc. All just spray acid except one.
Room .
Dungeon oasis. Lake of pure water, grove of TOMB WEED, HUNCHBACK COBRAs and HOOK DEVILs drinking together in peace. If you start a fight here everyone in the dungeon will find out about it and regard you with unremitting hostility forever.
Room .
GARAMBRA the STINKING CLOWN, wearing SILVER SHIELD, meditating atop stone pillar to unlock its full power, which they intend to use to conquer world.
Room .
Featureless span of corridor w/ pacing ELDER VAMPIRE in bleak, contemplative mood, searching for reason even to live. Not aggressive until given one - then will immediately turn on PCs. Will come up w/ one on own in half hour or so.
Room .
SIGHT: Everything is coated in fine layer of snail slime.
SOUND: Every noise echoes precisely once.
HUNCHBACK COBRAs engaged in elaborate mating ritual. Single HOOK DEVIL watching w/ creepy intensity.
Room .
HOOK DEVIL on a banjo, playing the Humanoid Blues.
Room .
SOUND: Coins clinking.
SMELL: Air painfully dry.
Crossroads, but one exit just loops back around into the other one. Walls of loop contain shelves for entombed corpses w/ gold coins on their eyes and ROT SCORPION concealed in their flesh.
Room .
Hall of statues that look exactly like RUST DRAKE. One of them is hollow and filled with ROT SCORPION.
Room .
SOUND: Agonizingly slow waterdrip.
SIGHT: Immense limestone stalactites hang from ceiling.
Foucault pendulum tracing path in sand of dungeon floor. Messing with it affects gravity slightly throughout entire dungeon.
Room .
Time moves slower the closer you get to the middle of this room. OBERLER the INSECURE POLITICIAN, wearing a crown, wielding SPIDER STILETTO caught in stasis at exact centre. In fact crown is cursed - you can remove it pretty easily, breaking the curse and halting the effect, but in the time it takes you several years will have passed outside. OBERLER the INSECURE POLITICIAN is notorious character from history.
Room .
Lava tube. Cracks in walls, HOOK DEVILs compressed in spaces behind cracks. Not planning to ambush, terrified of you, want you to go away. One has a CLOCK OF THE OAK and no idea how to use it. Neither do you.
Room .
SIGHT: Fetishes of bone and feathers dangle from the ceiling.
Site of ancient battle. Hundreds of skeletons, rusted armour, shattered helms. Single, functioning MACE OF THE OWL somewhere in mess, but searching for it likely to disturb spirits of the dead.
Room .
PHOEBOBO the RHYMING DOCTOR corners you, demands that you answer their riddles to determine which of the paths before you is true and which is false. One path conceals a swinging-blade trap, PHOEBOBO the RHYMING DOCTOR fully aware of where this is and how to circumvent it.
Room .
Waterfall that trickles in through crack in wall, disappears in swirling vortex into crack in earth. Tricky climb, must be made to pass room. HUNCHBACK COBRA den hidden in cave behind waterfall, half-digested POWDER OF SPRING in stomach of sleeping HUNCHBACK COBRA.
Room .
SOUND: Slow, monotonous weeping. Sounds like it's been going for a very long time.
SIGHT: The roots of an ancient tree emerge from the roof.
Big circular room, ELDER VAMPIRE armed with LONGBOW OF THE LICH patrolling boundaries. ELDER VAMPIRE will not allow anyone to pass straight through crossroads. Doesn't mind you turning corners. Cheating by trying to turn two corners will be strictly punished.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls carved w/ ancient glyphs, adorned w/ partial mosaics.
HOOK DEVIL barracks-room, mostly empty. One fat HOOK DEVIL slobberingly asleep in corner. Has PAINTBRUSH OF CHAOS on string around neck.
Room .
Completely empty room. Or is it? Yes. Yes it is.
Room .
AMAFFOPP the MOROSE MERCHANT, suffering catastrophic memory failure, no longer sure which way they came in. Single glowing blue mushroom in centre of room does nothing if touched. Memories leeched by prolonged exposure to its light. Eating it gives you all the memories it's absorbed.
Room .
Feast hall / audience chamber of underworld king. One entrance on either side of hall. ELDER VAMPIRE in throne at end of hall hearing stream of HOOK DEVIL petitioners.
Room .
VOLMAEL the DOUR PEDDLER, pacing. Could swear there was a secret door somewhere along this otherwise featureless corridor (there isn't).
Room .
SMELL: Dry and musty, like mummy wrappings and black mold.
One exit blocked by enormous obese ROT SCORPION, will only move if presented with still-alive captured HOOK DEVIL or enormous quantity of garbage.
Room .
ELDER VAMPIRE chained by leg or eye-stalk to centre of room. Half a dozen scabby HOOK DEVILs taunting and jeering it.
Room .
Crevasse just wide enough to jump across. Darkness above. Anyone who falls in comes out of roof, keeps falling until caught. There was a huge butterfly net in room and now you know why.
Room .
Panicky HOOK DEVIL wearing obviously-stolen BELT OF CHAOS caught at fork in road, not sure which way to go. In one round TYRFEN the OBESE SENATOR, conspicuously missing BELT OF CHAOS, will emerge on scene and demand it back.
Room .
Staircase wraps around inner wall of well. One exit high up, one at water level. Water pitch black. RUST DRAKE that lives in well usually not hungry, can be roused to surface by ringing bell at very top of shaft.
Room .
One exit blocked by enormous obese ROT SCORPION, will only move if presented with still-alive captured HOOK DEVIL or enormous quantity of garbage.
Room .
Floor of cave is shoulder-high thicket of TOMB WEEDS. Exits raised. Stones protruding from top of thicket let you jump across. TOMB WEEDs carnivorous, HUNCHBACK COBRAs in symbiotic relationship w/ them will attack when you are halfway across.
Room .
SIGHT: The roots of an ancient tree emerge from the roof.
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
HUNCHBACK COBRA den. Where they keep their babies. Parents not pleased to see you.
Room .
Long flight of marble stairs painted black and white like piano keys. Stepping on wrong stairs flattens them into slide, makes climbing extremely difficult, getting down fun. Somebody in room G knows secret pattern or it's hidden in mosaic on walls. Anyone who's a musician gets a bonus to working it out. You decide which side PCs start on.
Room .
SMELL: Strangely warm, like being in a kiln.
VOLLISCO the PITIABLE CAPTAIN, playing the flute. Has no idea they're in a dungeon. Can see everything around them perfectly clearly, just refuses to believe it's a dungeon. Will confabulate other things it could be. Flute not magical unless you desperately need it to be.
Room .
Foucault pendulum tracing path in sand of dungeon floor. Messing with it affects gravity slightly throughout entire dungeon.
Room .
Vertical shaft w/ rope hanging from ceiling, goes two-thirds of way to floor.
Room .
SIGHT: Room is part of ancient mansion, walls are rotting wood.
HOOK DEVILs in flimsy tin-pan armour, wielding long pointy sticks, riding poorly-tamed HUNCHBACK COBRAs, practicing jousting.
Room .
SMELL: Meaty reek of underworld flowers, like frying fat and potpourri.
ISHISK the GREEDY COURTIER attempting to domesticate HUNCHBACK COBRA, with limited success. Has been reliably informed that HUNCHBACK COBRA's favourite food is TOMB WEED, will pay semi-handsomely for samples.
Room .
RUST DRAKE asleep in centre of irregular room, can only be squeezed round w/ difficulty.
Room .
SMELL: Delicious stew boiling. The more you sniff at it the more it changes to rotting flesh.
SOUND: Whistling of underworld wind from cracks in wall.
Beautiful woman made of glass, living in pit of liquid glass. Can see future with 95% accuracy. No particular reason to help PCs, but would rather like to get her hands on fragile glass chalice in room h (she'll eat it). Would be worth a lot if somehow extracted from dungeon and sold as artwork. Scream is like damp fingertip on rim of wineglass, summons RUST DRAKE from another part of dungeon.
Room .
SIGHT: Extremely high ceiling narrows to tiny skylight.
SOUND: Rumble of tectonic plates shifting, impossibly loud and distant.
Looks like three-way intersection. One exit actually trap, leads to immediate dead end and floor collapse. Then HOOK DEVILs come in and start poking you w/ sticks.
Room .
Rallying grounds for small HOOK DEVIL army. ELDER VAMPIRE currently giving rousing speech to assembled phalanx, promising riches/success in afterlife to soldier that brings back the the juiciest human baby.
Room .
SOUND: Rumble of tectonic plates shifting, impossibly loud and distant.
SMELL: Vomit.
Bunch of HOOK DEVILs quivering in fear as you approach. RUST DRAKE followed you in, is directly behind you.
Room .
Smooth, round tunnel of enormous ROT SCORPION, which you will find advancing towards you when you are halfway along.
Room .
SOUND: Howling laughter, swiftly fades to nothing.
WAXOPPON the CRUEL MERCHANT, wearing SAILOR'S CROWN, meditating atop stone pillar to unlock its full power, which they intend to use to conquer world.
Room .
SMELL: Rotten-egg brimstone.
Mechanical platform that takes you from top of shaft to bottom of shaft w/ ease. Third exit halfway up shaft, goes by too quickly to jump to. Each time you use it, 25% chance that tinkering HOOK DEVILs will jam the platform just below the third exit and attack from above.
Room .
SIGHT: Dust on every flat surface.
Single enormous TOMB WEED growing up towards skylight in very top of room. ROT SCORPION nesting in roots.
Room .
Couple of HOOK DEVILs around shallow pit, gambling on combat between trained ROT SCORPION. Intruders will be hurled into pit, but if you wait long enough the furious loser will accuse the winner of cheating and a fight will ensure.
Room .
SOUND: Dead silence. Even your voices muffled.
ELDER VAMPIRE lowering itself to play dice w/ HOOK DEVIL retainers. Will pretend it's condescending to let you live so long as you amuse it by joining in. Actually, not totally sure it can take you, not really in fighting mood, will throw game and say you've earned your freedom. Has LAMP OF THE DESERT, might be convinced to wager it if stakes high enough.
Room .
At least twenty doors. Most just lead into cupboards full of toxic mould, foul garderobes or empty sarcophagi. A few are unopenable, having nothing but rock behind them. SONDAMBRA the MOROSE EXPLORER has got themselves trapped behind one and there's a half-rotted GAUNTLET OF THE FOREST in the wardrobe behind another.
Room .
ELDER VAMPIRE is having tea party w/ nervous HOOK DEVILs, kidnapped GRUFLEY the OLD BEGGAR. Will insist that you join it. Will murder people for impoliteness, reward proper etiquette w/ fine and expensive cakes.
Room .
Pit with ROT SCORPION lurking at bottom. V. poorly concealed. A couple of gold coins and a GIANT'S BELT in extremely poor condition gleam among the bones of a dead adventurer.
Room .
PHOEBFORD the BOASTFUL GLADIATOR corners you, demands that you answer their riddles to determine which of the paths before you is true and which is false. One path conceals a swinging-blade trap, PHOEBFORD the BOASTFUL GLADIATOR fully aware of where this is and how to circumvent it.
Room .
Narrow bridge across swiftly-rushing underground river. Anyone who falls in will be carried out of dungeon, take bashing damage from rocks. HOOK DEVIL ambush party clinging to underside of bridge and/or ceiling, will attack halfway across. Some kind of perception check to spot.
Room .
SOUND: Howling laughter, swiftly fades to nothing.
SMELL: Delicious stew boiling. The more you sniff at it the more it changes to rotting flesh.
One passage being slowly walled off by HOOK DEVILs under supervision of cranky, half-asleep ELDER VAMPIRE who is enforcing compliance w/ threat of physical violence, eternal torment.
Room .
Stepping stones over slow-trickling underground river. Actually pretty easy to cross. HUNCHBACK COBRAs drinking at edges, not aggressive unless provoked. Easy to provoke though.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls carved w/ ancient glyphs, adorned w/ partial mosaics.
Room shaped like inside of tetrahedron. Anyone standing in etched circle in room's centre teleported to random other room of dungeon. Can be controlled by fetching tetrahedronal crystal in room , will grant access to secret treasure chamber w/ no doors leading to it. Someone has to stay behind to teleport you out again.
Room .
Apparent dead end in HOOK DEVIL workshop. Secret door concealed beneath anvil. HOOK DEVIL blacksmith not pleased to see you, will attack with half-forged DIRK OF THE MOUNTAIN, only continue to forge it if compelled. Possibility that PCs emerge from beneath anvil.
Room .
SIGHT: Empty, rusted iron cages hang from hooks in the wall.
Two bridges across enormous bottomless pit. They do not intersect. Easy to go directly across, difficult to turn corners.
Room .
RUST DRAKE den. Sulphuric fumes vent from somewhere deep within. Contains skeleton holding BLESSED LONGBOW, which in addition to other powers gets +2 against RUST DRAKE. 50% chance that RUST DRAKE is out. Secret way out of dungeon, big enough for monster to fit through.
Room .
HOOK DEVIL herdsmen squabbling over where the sweetest TOMB WEEDS are. Ones in room apparently not sweet enough. Herds of HUNCHBACK COBRAs getting bored, hungry.
Room .
SONDAERYS the RHYMING PRINCESS consulting beautifully-drawn, inaccurate dungeon map. They are looking for a DRUM OF DISGUISE, an heirloom of their family, which was stolen by HOOK DEVILs and is now hidden in a filth-crusted sack somewhere in room H.
Room .
Beam of light comes down from above. SCYTHE OF THE PHOENIX embedded in monolith in room's centre. Can only be removed by hand of true king, which can be found - dried, placed in wall sconce, candle placed in curled fingers, is now magical torch that reveals ghosts - in room .
Room .
Dungeon cenote. Sides overgrown with TOMB WEED, climbdownable. Beautiful turquoise blue water. Bioluminescent bacteria intelligent, psychic, capable of projecting terrifyingly potent hallucinations/activating devotional centre of brain to make you think you see God. Bottom of cenote littered w/ human skeletons from sacrifices. Bacteria feed off flesh. One exit through underwater tunnel, skeleton in tunnel clutches bag of diamond dust and wears water-damaged CORONET OF INTELLECT. HOOK DEVIL cultists soon to return.
Room .
Big wooden door halfway along corridor locked as fuck. Key in possession of HOOK DEVIL in room i.
Room .
Inverted ziggurat - steps going down to bottom of room, altar to dungeon god at lowest point. STATHRICK the INSECURE BEGGAR is tied to altar with HOOK DEVILs preparing to sacrifice them. Everything exactly as it seems.
Room .
Apparently empty room w/ very high ceiling. Vibrations in floor disturb the nests, cause rain of ROT SCORPIONs. Safe to move around edges of room.
Room .
Two statues. One always tells lies, one always tells the truth. They only know things that statues would know. None of the passages out of this room are trapped or dangerous in any way.
Room .
One path overgrown w/ TOMB WEED, one dry and barren, one littered w/ skeletons. TOMB WEEDs carnivorous, practiced in throwing bones across room for no other reason that they can't digest them and find them unseemly.
Room .
SMELL: Air painfully dry.
RUST DRAKE w/ BLESSED TRIDENT stuck in it. Extremely unhappy. Someone in room concealing serious wound, would like BLESSED TRIDENT back.
Room .
Seems like straight corridor. Really obvious secret doors spaced out at five-metre intervals along corridor - loose bricks, bookshelves w/ books sticking out, candlesticks on funny angles, etc. All just spray acid except one.
Room .
Cube-shaped room w/ square sliding puzzle on plinth in centre. Fetching missing piece from room and solving puzzle will completely reconfigure dungeon, reality around PCs. Roll a new dungeon, place PCs in random room.
Room .
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
SOUND: Agonizingly slow waterdrip.
Rope bridge across underground lake. Third exit at water level, can be accessed by diving into water, but you'll want some plan for getting out again. RUST DRAKE that lives in lake usually not hungry.
Room .
HOOK DEVILs engaging in orgiastic rite to win favour of dungeon god. Incredibly eager for you to join in.
Room .
SMELL: Vomit.
SOUND: Boom of distant explosions, clatter of drills.
Looks like empty room. Actually maw of cave leviathan, those weird stalagmites its teeth. Glimmer of treasure deep in gullet is pyrite lure. HUNCHBACK COBRAs pick dead flesh from between teeth.
Room .
Hall lined w/ oil paintings of forgotten aristocracy. Some have been defaced. Cursory knowledge of local history will tell you which conceals secret door.
Room .
One exit blocked by enormous obese ROT SCORPION, will only move if presented with still-alive captured HOOK DEVIL or enormous quantity of garbage.
Room .
SOUND: Every noise echoes precisely once.
Space-distorting statue in exactly-square corner of corridor. Shaking right hand will increase number of corners until corridor is mile-long side of polygon. Shaking left hand will decrease it again.
Room .
SIGHT: Dust on every flat surface.
Room shaped like inside of tetrahedron. Anyone standing in etched circle in room's centre teleported to random other room of dungeon. Can be controlled by fetching tetrahedronal crystal in room , will grant access to secret treasure chamber w/ no doors leading to it. Someone has to stay behind to teleport you out again.
Room .
SOUND: Burble of distant river.
SMELL: Meaty reek of underworld flowers, like frying fat and potpourri.
Actual dungeon, exists to hold prisoners. Guarded by pair of HOOK DEVILs, one sleepy, one watchful. They are siblings. Couple of human captives in pitiful condition, starving in cells. One is ZERKULIA the FORGETFUL POET.
Room .
SCABOSSUS the EVIL DUKE corners you, demands that you answer their riddles to determine which of the paths before you is true and which is false. One path conceals a swinging-blade trap, SCABOSSUS the EVIL DUKE fully aware of where this is and how to circumvent it.
Room .
Beautiful woman made of glass, living in pit of liquid glass. Can see future with 95% accuracy. No particular reason to help PCs, but would rather like to get her hands on fragile glass chalice in room (she'll eat it). Would be worth a lot if somehow extracted from dungeon and sold as artwork. Scream is like damp fingertip on rim of wineglass, summons RUST DRAKE from another part of dungeon.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls are sandstone, gritty when you touch them.
SMELL: Air disgustingly humid.
Pool of stagnant water with treasure chest at bottom. Treasure chest contains bound, gagged SILKONIA the ABSENT-MINDED WATCHMAN, is temporarily watertight. If released SILKONIA the ABSENT-MINDED WATCHMAN will demand vengeance on HOOK DEVIL in room a, offer reward for assistance in this matter.
Room .
Two statues. One always tells lies, one always tells the truth. They only know things that statues would know. None of the passages out of this room are trapped or dangerous in any way.
Room .
THEODLANTA the MASKED POET impressing HOOK DEVILs w/ magical powers of SPIDER DOUBLET, attempting to convince them that it is their rightful king. Will turn them on PCs if they do not show THEODLANTA the MASKED POET proper signs of obeisance. HOOK DEVILs just humouring THEODLANTA the MASKED POET, will happily play along.
Room .
Lightless oubliette. FELLEY the INSECURE GARDENER has been trapped in here for at least twenty years, some HOOK DEVILs coming by to feed and water them occasionally.
Room .
SMELL: Salty as sea-air.
Rope bridge across underground lake. Third exit at water level, can be accessed by diving into water, but you'll want some plan for getting out again. RUST DRAKE that lives in lake usually not hungry.
Room .
SOUND: Sound like crunching glass or gnawing teeth. Comes from within walls.
Enormous mirror is scrying-portal to alternate realms. ELDER VAMPIRE getting stern lecture from overboss in Plane of Chaos/other, better dungeon/Hell, will shortly emerge in extremely foul mood. If there is a mirror anywhere else in the dungeon this mirror will let you look out of it.
Room .
SOUND: Coins clinking.
Bunch of HOOK DEVILs who were just pointlessly fucking sitting there waiting for something to walk in so they could attack it.
Room .
SOUND: Every noise echoes precisely once.
HOOK DEVIL games room. Mildewed cardboard boxes, rotting tomes with amusing titles like Ye Olde Playeres Handbooke. Spotty HOOK DEVILS hunched over reasonably flat rock playing Humans and Hamlets with dice made of bone and precious stones. One of the dice is actually lucky.
Room .
Corridor lined on each side with mirrors so it looks like infinite PCs crawling through infinite dungeons. There is a mirror somewhere in room m and next time you enter it you will see your reflections banging against the glass, claiming that they are the real PCs and you are just their reflections.
Room .
SMELL: Humans being cooked. Indistinguishable from roast pork except to trained noses.
ELDER VAMPIRE dabbling in painting, composing a still life from scene of ROT SCORPION and bones. Having trouble getting the ROT SCORPION to stay still. Has left a paint canister (turbulent green) in room , politely promises to kill you unless you go get it right now.
Room .
Couple of sorry-looking HOOK DEVILs roasting ROT SCORPION over fire. In surprisingly good mood, will share. If you get sick and pass out from the feast they will definitely kill you, but otherwise harmless.
Room .
Bedchamber of three, four HOOK DEVILs. Sodden and filthy. Careful inspection of damp rags that serve as bedding will reveal a(n) +1 CLOCK in surprisingly good condition, but forces save against filth fever.
Room .
PHOEBESTER the DEAF PIRATE attempting to domesticate HUNCHBACK COBRA, with limited success. Has been reliably informed that HUNCHBACK COBRA's favourite food is TOMB WEED, will pay semi-handsomely for samples.
Room .
SIGHT: Ammonite, trilobite fossils visible in walls.
Bubbling lake of mildly corrosive alkaline goo must be navigated via stepping stones. ROT SCORPION hidden in goo, obviously. Harmless until you get any blood in the goo, then will go into feeding frenzy.
Room .
Space is bent in such a way that walking down this tunnel will bring you out in room .
Room .
SIGHT: Walls rough-hewn chunks of black glass, edges sharp to touch.
Shrine to dungeon god. Altar will curse you if you touch it unless you prepare the proper sacrifices, which consist of one ritually smothered HUNCHBACK COBRA. If you do it will bless you. One HOOK DEVIL elsewhere in dungeon is priest, knows secret to this.
Room .
SOUND: Muffled voices from next room.
ELDER VAMPIRE laboratory. Weird hybrid things bubble away in glass tanks. At least one attempted crossbreed between HOOK DEVIL and HUNCHBACK COBRA. ELDER VAMPIRE not there. ANGWEPP the OBSEQUIOUS POLITICIAN pretends to be experimental captive, is actually willing lab assistant.
Room .
SMELL: Metallic tang of hour-old blood.
Single incredibly-intelligent HOOK DEVIL has found only space in dungeon where it is possible to just sit and think. If left to own devices will rule own kingdom on surface world in ~10 years.
Room .
Formerly a wizard's study. Now a breeding pair of HUNCHBACK COBRAs has made a nest of the spellbooks, which reveal interesting magical snippets if closely examined. Torn-up pages, gummed back together, may have produced odd new spells.
Room .
Map room. Globes, nautical charts, atlases, blueprints, guidebooks. ELDER VAMPIRE studying X-marked plan of faraway island, so enthralled that it has difficulty noticing PCs. Exquisite rug on room's floor seems like abstract pattern, careful study reveals it to be map of dungeon itself.
Room .
SMELL: Air disgustingly humid.
SIGHT: Room is part of ancient castle, walls are slabs of stone.
ELDER VAMPIRE bedchamber. Four-poster bed, priceless paintings kidnapped from world are hung on walls and artistically befouled. Fairy kept in cage as singing nightlight begs release, claims to be able to grant wishes, can't. Golden key to cage discarded in room , ELDER VAMPIRE concluded they will never need it. Cage highly portable, otherwise unbreakable.
Room .
Hideout for rebellious HOOK DEVILs, unwilling to recognize authority of ELDER VAMPIRE, want to establish tiny republic in forgotten dungeon crevice.
Room .
SIGHT: Fetishes of bone and feathers dangle from the ceiling.
SOUND: Muffled voices from next room.
Single enormous carnivorous TOMB WEED that is secretly intelligent and the mastermind behind everything that happens in this dungeon.
Room .
Ledge halfway up wall of big cylindrical pit-cavern, no way in, out except via entrances to ledge. RUST DRAKE trapped at bottom of pit, bleeding from a number of minor wounds. Extremely long spiked sticks for poking it with. Couple of HOOK DEVILs indulging in this pastime.
Room .
One of those Ripley's Believe It Or Not rooms where there's a row of mirrors along one wall and once you go around the corridor you can see through them. Couple of HOOK DEVILs behind mirrors making fun of PCs, will flee as they approach. If the PCs linger, HOBBUNTO the ARROGANT GARDENER will come through on the other side of the mirrors and accidentally reveal something they would kill to keep secret.
Room .
Observatory. Star charts, half-ground lenses, celestial globes, tables of astronomical data (looks like random numbers) and pulsar emissions. ELDER VAMPIRE mesmerized by whatever it sees through single enormous telescope. If you broke the telescope's lens you could climb out of the dungeon through it.
Room .
ELDER VAMPIRE's walk-in wardrobe. One entrance through wardrobe doors, one hidden behind layers of clothing. Careful searching will reveal a EARRING OF BLASTING, two living scarves that try to strangle you and a HOOK DEVIL in fancy dress.
Room .
Single incredibly-intelligent HOOK DEVIL has found only space in dungeon where it is possible to just sit and think. If left to own devices will rule own kingdom on surface world in ~10 years.
Room .
Vertical shaft w/ rope hanging from ceiling, goes two-thirds of way to floor.
Room .
Bunch of HOOK DEVILs who were just pointlessly fucking sitting there waiting for something to walk in so they could attack it.
Room .
Actual dungeon, exists to hold prisoners. Guarded by pair of HOOK DEVILs, one sleepy, one watchful. They are siblings. Couple of human captives in pitiful condition, starving in cells. One is EDRAX the OILY CHAMBERMAID.
Room .
Bedchamber of three, four HOOK DEVILs. Sodden and filthy. Careful inspection of damp rags that serve as bedding will reveal a(n) DEMON'S ROD in surprisingly good condition, but forces save against filth fever.
Room .
Observatory. Star charts, half-ground lenses, celestial globes, tables of astronomical data (looks like random numbers) and pulsar emissions. ELDER VAMPIRE mesmerized by whatever it sees through single enormous telescope. If you broke the telescope's lens you could climb out of the dungeon through it.
Room .
SOUND: Boom of distant explosions, clatter of drills.
Staircase wraps around inner wall of well. One exit high up, one at water level. Water pitch black. RUST DRAKE that lives in well usually not hungry, can be roused to surface by ringing bell at very top of shaft.
Room .
SIGHT: Room is part of ancient castle, walls are slabs of stone.
Hideout for rebellious HOOK DEVILs, unwilling to recognize authority of ELDER VAMPIRE, want to establish tiny republic in forgotten dungeon crevice.
Room .
SMELL: Salty as sea-air.
Almost-frictionless surface. Works like the ice puzzles in Pokemon - once you pick a direction you're stuck with it until you hit a solid surface. Dotted with menhirs. One HOOK DEVIL w/ projectile weapon at far end of room.
Room .
SIGHT: Walls are sandstone, gritty when you touch them.
Enormous brass lever that raises/lowers water level throughout whole dungeon. There is another, similar level in room .
Room .
HOOK DEVILs in flimsy tin-pan armour, wielding long pointy sticks, riding poorly-tamed HUNCHBACK COBRAs, practicing jousting.
Room .
SMELL: Dry and musty, like mummy wrappings and black mold.
Lightless oubliette. PHALOVRA the TRAITOROUS DUELIST has been trapped in here for at least twenty years, some HOOK DEVILs coming by to feed and water them occasionally.
Room .
Floor of cave is shoulder-high thicket of TOMB WEEDS. Exits raised. Stones protruding from top of thicket let you jump across. TOMB WEEDs carnivorous, HUNCHBACK COBRAs in symbiotic relationship w/ them will attack when you are halfway across.
Room .
SIGHT: Extremely high ceiling narrows to tiny skylight.
SOUND: Whistling of underworld wind from cracks in wall.
Crossroads, but one exit just loops back around into the other one. Walls of loop contain shelves for entombed corpses w/ gold coins on their eyes and ROT SCORPION concealed in their flesh.
Room .
SMELL: Zoosmell, like pressing your face to a tiger and inhaling.
One passage being slowly walled off by HOOK DEVILs under supervision of cranky, half-asleep ELDER VAMPIRE who is enforcing compliance w/ threat of physical violence, eternal torment.
Room .
HUNCHBACK COBRA den. Where they keep their babies. Parents not pleased to see you.
Room .
SMELL: Faint caramelly smell of exotic woods.
Formerly a wizard's study. Now a breeding pair of HUNCHBACK COBRAs has made a nest of the spellbooks, which reveal interesting magical snippets if closely examined. Torn-up pages, gummed back together, may have produced odd new spells.
Room .
SMELL: Spoiled-sweet, like garbage.
SOUND: Crunch of footsteps on sand.
Single enormous carnivorous TOMB WEED that is secretly intelligent and the mastermind behind everything that happens in this dungeon.
Room .
Pool of stagnant water with treasure chest at bottom. Treasure chest contains bound, gagged VIRUS the STARVING ASSASSIN, is temporarily watertight. If released VIRUS the STARVING ASSASSIN will demand vengeance on HOOK DEVIL in room , offer reward for assistance in this matter.
Room .
SIGHT: Fetishes of bone and feathers dangle from the ceiling.
Long flight of marble stairs painted black and white like piano keys. Stepping on wrong stairs flattens them into slide, makes climbing extremely difficult, getting down fun. Somebody in room knows secret pattern or it's hidden in mosaic on walls. Anyone who's a musician gets a bonus to working it out. You decide which side PCs start on.